


trim yourself to fit the world

by CapriciousCrab



Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)
Genre: Established Relationship, Fluff, Haircuts, M/M, Mild Hurt/Comfort, Quarantine
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-12
Updated: 2020-04-12
Packaged: 2021-03-02 03:07:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,800
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23617984
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CapriciousCrab/pseuds/CapriciousCrab
Summary: “Can I give you a haircut for a video?”Caught off guard, Dan blinks in confusion. “Excuse me?”*Phil wants to cut Dan's hair, Dan has second thoughts.
Relationships: Dan Howell/Phil Lester
Comments: 16
Kudos: 170





	trim yourself to fit the world

It's cozy in the flat today. The lounge is warm and the sunlight seems soft as if filtered through layers of filmy gauze. Dan's keyboard seems overly loud in contrast, echoing through the room as he types with his brow furrowed in concentration.

It's writing day and it's going better than it has in a while. He lets himself get lost in the words, drifting from his thoughts to the keys until he's startled out of his zen-like trance by the sound of Phil's feet carrying him into the room. Dan looks up to find Phil standing in front of him and saves his document before patting the space next to him in invitation.

“Can I give you a haircut for a video?”

Caught off guard, Dan blinks in confusion. “Excuse me?”

Phil laughs and drops down next to Dan on the sofa. Dan lifts his arm, the motion as instinctive now as breathing, and waits for Phil to tuck himself under it. He’s sure he couldn’t have heard Phil correctly; he couldn’t possibly be serious about cutting his hair, could he? 

But Phil repeats himself, smiling in that way he has that means he’s clearly up to no good and that Dan should be very, very careful. “Can I give you a haircut? You can’t keep smashing a hat over it, and it looks like it may be a while yet before you can get a proper one.” 

Dan stares back at him incredulously. “You can’t be serious? Phil, you can’t even trim your own hair! What makes you think I’m going to let you anywhere near me with a pair of scissors?” 

“Surely it’s easier to do someone else?” Phil says with a shrug. 

Dan snickers and opens his mouth to say something lewd, but Phil cuts him off.

“C’mon, Dan. I’m _bored_. I promise I’ll be careful?” Phil says hopefully. 

He looks so excited by the idea that Dan hates to say no, but there’s no way he’s letting Phil get anywhere near his head with his shaky hands and wayward attention span. He has an image of himself, curls scalped to within an inch of their life and his forehead on display for all to see and has to hold back a shudder of genuine fear.

“Sorry, bub, but I’ll pass on the home haircut.” He pats Phil’s thigh and ignores the pout Phil aims in his direction. “Maybe next pandemic.”

“You’re no fun, Dan,” Phil sighs as he gets to his feet. He wanders over to Norman’s tank and places his fingertip gently against the glass, smiling when Norman swims over to investigate. He sprinkles a pinch of fish food into the tank before heading back to drop a kiss to the top of Dan’s head. “But I love you anyway.”

“Oh, well. I’m gratified to know you love me even if I bore you,” Dan huffs with a laugh. He watches Phil putter around the lounge and has to bite his tongue when Phil waters the plants he’d already watered this morning, not wanting to add the creeping anxiety he can see growing behind Phil’s mask of pleasant cheerfulness. “Hey. Do you want to play something? I can put this away for now.”

Phil’s smile lights up his face and makes something in Dan’s chest light up too, that same warmth he feels every time Phil gives him that smile that’s just for Dan. So he’s surprised when Phil turns him down.

“Nah, you were in the middle of writing and I shouldn’t have interrupted. I guess I just like you a little too much.” 

Phil comes to stand before him and pushes the mess of curls off of Dan’s forehead before leaning down to press his lip to the exposed skin. He lingers a moment, breathing in the scent of Dan’s shampoo before straightening up once more. 

“See you when you’re done for the day,” Phil says. 

“So what are you going to do then?" He can't help the stirring of guilt he feels, but he is not about to let Phil anywhere near his head. 

"Oh, I'll find something to do," Phil answers breezily. He tosses a little wave over his shoulder as he leaves the room, heading toward the kitchen and what Dan assumes will be his third cup of coffee today. 

Turning back to his laptop he attempts to get back into the zone but he keeps thinking about Phil wandering the flat like a chaotic ghost, leaving mayhem in his wake and closes his laptop with a sigh. He's not even thinking about giving in to Phil's request. Not for one second. Not at all.

Goddamn it.

*

"Hey, guys! So today I'm doing something a _little_ different…"

Dan tunes out the sound of Phil's voice as he does his intro. They're sat in the bedroom, and Phil has his instruments of torture laid out on top of the hastily cleared dresser. He eyes the shiny scissors with dread and can practically feel the sweat breaking out across his skin.

"...my glamorous assistant Dan!" 

He turns to the camera and gives a half-hearted smile. "Hello there internet." He sounds a bit stiff and unsure of himself, but Phil plays off of him as effortlessly as usual.

"As you can see Dan has no faith in my abilities." Phil leans over and snatches up the scissors and clicks them maniacally near Dan's ear, making him jump. "But I'm going to give him a proper haircut!"

"Jesus Christ, Phil! You nearly cut my ear off!" Dan squawks dramatically. He's not playing it up; he's genuinely bricking it. "Be careful!"

"You'll be fine," he says dismissively, but he gives Dan a reassuring pat on the shoulder. "I quite like your ears where they are."

Dan can't hide his surprise, Phil's boldness catching him off-guard. It wasn't an over the top couple-y sort of comment but it felt like more than their usual on-screen banter. He's not sure whether to play it up or play it off but then the moment passes without him saying a word.

Phil rolls over Dan's awkward silence with the ease of a professional. "As you can see, Dan here is a bit jumpy. It's been a while since he's been onscreen or had a haircut so today we're killing two fish with one bubble, as they say in the north. So let's get cutting!"

He reaches for a spray bottle full of water and Dan nearly bolts.

"Phil! You don't cut curly hair when it's wet. It has to be dry! Did you even research how to cut hair?" he asks indignantly.

Phil's wide-eyed blinking says very clearly that he did not research how to cut hair. 

"Phil, I really don't know about this," Dan says. He brings his hand up to run through his hair and bites his lip, looking at Phil through the viewfinder. He's afraid Phil will be disappointed but Phil just shrugs good-naturedly.

"Alright. Why don't you cut mine then instead?" he says softly. "C'mon, up you get."

They shuffle around until Phil is in the chair with Dan standing behind him, opening and closing the scissors nervously as he combs through Phil's hair. It's thick and a little choppy in the back where his cowlick sends his hair off in different directions, but Dan thinks he can see how it should be done.

"Okay. Okay, I think I can do this." He combs through Phil's hair one last time before taking a deep breath. "Are you ready?"

"Yeah, go on. I trust you."

He's sure Phil didn't mean for that to sound accusing but it stings nonetheless and it shows in the tightness of his voice. "It's not about trust, Phil. It's about skill and hair texture and how curls are harder to cut-"

"Dan, you know I didn't mean it like that," Phil sighs. "I'm not offended that you don’t want me to cut your hair."

"Are we arguing right now? Like, actually having a domestic on camera?" He forces a laugh and tries to play it off, but he's thrown by how weird everything feels now. It's been more than a year since they've filmed together like this and he feels like he's forgotten his lines, desperately waiting for someone to cue him in.

"Dan," Phil gets up and turns off the camera before coming to rest his hands on Dan's shoulders. He's as gentle as always, and it eases the knot that had been growing in Dan's chest. "We don't have to film. Why did you say yes to this when you clearly don’t feel comfortable with it?"

His gaze skitters away from Phil's face, roaming the space of their room until Phil says his name quietly.

"I didn't want you to be disappointed. I know I say no to a lot of things now and I just- I just thought I could slip back into it, you know? But it feels different." He shrugs helplessly and hopes Phil understands what he means. "It feels like something that doesn't fit quite right anymore."

Phil nods because he does understand. He understands Dan more than anyone else he's ever known and Dan's so goddamn grateful that Phil can listen to the mess of words Dan spits out and piece them into something that makes sense.

The smile he gives Dan is soft and his eyes are soft too, filled with a sweet fondness that Dan can never get enough of seeing aimed at him.

"Stupid,” he says fondly. ”You know I don't mind, right? I miss filming with you sometimes because it was fun and we had a good time. But I still have fun with you, you know? And it feels better now because it's just for us." Phil says. He leans in and rests his forehead against Dan's, rubbing their noses together briefly before pulling away. "So we're okay, yeah? You’re ok?" he asks.

"We're okay," Dan says with a relieved smile.

Phil grins and steps back, reaching for the scissors once more. "Good. So can I still cut your hair then?"

"Oh, fuck no." He pries the scissors from Phil's hand and tucks them away safely into his back pocket. "But you can make me one of your disgusting coffees and I'll even pretend to like it. Just put lots of that chocolate sauce on it."

"Or maybe we'll find a better use for that chocolate sauce, hmm?" Phil says over his shoulder as Dan follows him out of the room, tossing Dan an exaggerated wink before promptly stubbing his toe on the doorframe.

Dad laughs until he's breathless as he watches Phil hop around on one leg while trying to rub the ache from his toes, swearing under his breath the entire time.

Yeah, they were okay.

**Author's Note:**

> thanks for reading!
> 
> you can like/reblog [here](https://capriciouscrab.tumblr.com/post/615227191079403520/trim-yourself-to-fit-the-world-rating-t-word)
> 
> come say hi!


End file.
